I was born in USA but my parents took me back to India when I was 4. I am what they call an ABCD-- American born confused desi.
To be in conformity with both- the American and Indian culture is not as easy as it seems. There is a constant conflict of ideas scattered all around the place and that’s how some people also end up having identity crisis. I try to be myself; true to myself and others as well, but ultimately, the environment that you grow up in is what actually influences your thought processes, beliefs and nature. No matter how hard you try to fit in any given culture, you just cannot resist the urge of your ethnic heart dominating all your decisions.
Given that I’ve lived in the cultural capital (Vadodara: Cultural capital of Gujarat) of a dry state (Gujarat: A non-alcoholic state) in India (The second most populated country in the world) and am currently living in US, you bet that I speak at least four languages fluently and end up mixing them together without noticing.
It’s fair to say that ABCDs like me really know the importance of maintaining relationships. May it be a devoted friendship or a romantic long-distance relationship. WE TRY. WE TRY our best to empathize with people a lot and make everything work out in the best possible way.
When people ask me about my lifestyle back in India, I do hesitate a little for sharing certain things in the fear of coming across as a snob sometimes. The only reason behind that would be a drastic shift from an extremely slow-paced life where I could sit all day at home in leisure and get everything in my hands, like tea, snacks and a grand dinner, to straight up living in NYC- where walking quickly isn’t just about getting from one place to another as fast as possible, but is a point of pride and a vital part in a New Yorker’s life.
Time and again, people ask me how do I manage to speak English so well, and I always wonder why they aren’t aware of the fact that majority of schools in India are English-medium schools; not to ignore the fact that I continued to pursue English literature in my undergraduate degree, but that doesn’t really change how Indians should be perceived abroad. I have also met people who look forward to an explanation pertaining to my moderate American accent, and to be honest I don’t have an answer to that question. Although, what I do know is that a child starts to pick up on a language before even their first birthday. So, for me to have a moderate American accent shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone because I attended kindergarten in US.
NYIT; where I am currently pursuing my Masters degree in Communication Arts, has a close-knit community and it closely resonates with the environment in which I spent almost half of my life. This “small city” (and by small, I mean geographically small, because of course it is India that we are referring to) of over 2 million people is called Vadodara or Baroda, which also gives me the feeling of a close-knit community. Almost everyone in this small city know each other. Its amusing how out of nowhere you could bump into a Barodian in USA and still know each other through mutual friends or acquaintances.
So ya, this is my story and I feel that I belong everywhere, but nowhere.